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Welcome to Ho Chi Minh – Part IV

Welcome to Ho Chi Minh – Part IV

Sashi in Vietnam

Continuing her voyage in Ho Chi Minh, Vietnam, Sashi Sherpa shares her experience in this 4th part of her soon to publish book. We are proud to share this for the first time.

“This is how they call men in their spas. The only reason they have not approached me that way is because I am with you girls,” Ashish said, laughing and reading my mind. Woah! That explanation made sense actually. He had gone to Thailand couple of years ago so it was straight from the horse’s mouth. Saraniya and I still remember him going gaga about the story of his trip every day on our way back to home in the metro, until our ears bled.

“That’s what I was wondering, you are not so bad to look at, so why are they not giving you the attention. Now I understood. They must be thinking you and Saraniya are probably married Indian couple and I am someone you guys have picked up from here to spice up your marriage,” I joked.

Both of them burst into psychotic laughter, forgetting where we were. I also could not help myself, as I said, their laughter is infectious. We went into full on crazy laughter mode. We did not care if people were looking at us, or said anything. Once we were able to have some control, Saraniya slyly went close to Ashish and said, “Come and hold my hand, my dear husband.”

“Yes, my dear wife,” he played along and grabbed her left hand and made her walk faster than our usual pace. They had barely taken a few steps, when Saraniya stopped and said in her panting voice, “I cannot walk so fast.”

“That’s why you can never be my wife. How can you walk along with me in the path of my life with this speed?” He made a sad face.

“You cheap over-acting hero. You should have married P.T. Usha then!”

Their banter went on for some time, eventually leading into both of them laughing again hysterically, like maniacs, as always.

On the other hand, that white guy was still struggling to get out from the clutch of those beautiful women.

“Sirrrr…only ten dollars for you. We will give you extra massage,” I heard one of the girls saying while I walked past that commotion.

“No ladies, I am in no need of massage today. No matter how good of a massage you guys are going to give me,” he said to those girls in his heavy Irish accent and he still maintained a polite tone. But they barely paid heed to it as they still clung onto him, giving offers after offers, and reduction after reduction. They started their pitch with usd 10 which went down by 50 percent almost within a minute.

“Hahaha…Sashi, don’t get shocked. This happens in Pattaya too. They are offering him different kind of massages,” my colleague said to me.

“What? Seriously?”

“Of course! If you guys were not there, they would have offered me too.”

“Obviously, he would know. He blew his whole salary on such massages during his trip to Pattaya. Why don’t you tell us what you did there? We won’t tell anyone,” Saraniya intervened in her naughty tone.

“Of all the people, you think I will share my secrets with a motor-mouth like you. If I tell you here, whole India will know tomorrow. I won’t need news channel,” he said.

“Relax, whole India doesn’t concern you. We won’t tell your girlfriend.”

“Even if you tell her, it won’t matter because I was not dating then. Now change the topic. You will not know my dirty secrets.”

Only on rare occasions, Saraniya backs down and this was one of such instances.

With childlike excitement, she said, “Let’s do massage. Sashi and I can go for normal massage, right? We are girls so they won’t be interested, anyway.”

“Yeah, they can do normal regular massage even for men if we refuse what they are offering.”

“Let’s all go then…”

“Why not? Let’s do it. I have also never experienced it,” I said with equal eagerness.

Ashish used his bargaining skills and the next thing we knew, we were seated in a super bright pink sofa and girls wearing attire even brighter than that, took control of my feet and started brushing it.

“Ashish, where are you going to sit?” I asked him, seeing him standing.

“No, I am not gonna do it. You guys carry one.”

“Why? I thought we all had planned.”

“Actually, you guys carry on over here…I will see you guys in a while,” and walked out of the spa, escorted by one girl from the same spa.

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“He’s going for a special spa,” saying this, Saraniya let out a roaring laughter, throwing her head back- thankfully, the cushion on her back gave support to her over active action.

“Really!!…We need to finish this fast and go to the spa parlour he’s gone to,” I think I almost squealed that made the girl massaging my feet to startle. I said sorry to her and I told her in simplest English, slowly, “Do fast please. We need to go to find our brother.”

“Ohh…” she replied. She understood that we wanted it to get over fast. But it still took about 30 minutes.

As soon as we were done, we got hold of the girl who had escorted him. She happily took us to the one we went. And there we stood, right in front of the spa named ‘Dolly Spa’.

We stood there laughing our lungs out. We laughed seeing that name – ‘dolly’ has so much of ‘Indianism’ in it and every people living in north India somehow can relate to it. I broke into an instant jig and moving my arms and chest at the same time, I said- “dolly, dolly, dolly, dolly….” (Copying the act of Govinda from a movie scene called ‘Do not disturb’).

Just then, our colleague walked out of ‘the’ Dolly spa, looking all happy and radiating glow that could blind us.

“Saraniya, take the video of him coming out from ‘Dolly Spa’. Now!!!Man, this is iconic scene and not to mention, material worth blackmailing him later,” I screamed as I saw her holding phone in her hand.

Instantly, she started recording his grand exit. He saw our antic a bit late to get away from the frame of the recording camera.

“I will kill you both….” he came after us, laughing, but too late to stop us.

Our laughter echoed the whole street there.

In the next five minutes, the video of him coming out from ‘Dolly Spa’ went viral in our office group. He wasn’t happy about it but he could not stay angry with us for too long.

Definitely, what happens in Ho Chi Minh was definitely NOT likely to stay here.

Also Read – Welcome to Ho Chi Minh – Part III

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