Guinness record to Ashes: Assam’s afforestation goes up in flames
Assam’s ambitious afforestation drive turns to ashes, costing Rs 3.13 crore in saplings, with environmentalists raising eyebrows and government officials pointing fingers at ‘miscreants’. Is this a record-breaking achievement or a costly disaster?
Barely had the ink dried on the Guinness World Records certificate before nature (or possibly some enterprising arsonist) decided that Assam’s record-breaking afforestation drive would be better suited to the history books than the forests. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, a staggering Rs 3.13 crore’s worth of saplings, nurtured with all the tender loving care of a parent forcing a child into medical school, has now been reduced to the world’s most expensive bonfire.
The Bhairabkunda Reserve Forest, which was meant to be a glowing testament to human ingenuity, now resembles a tragic before-and-after shot from an environmental horror film. All that remains of the 9,21,730 saplings is a delightful smattering of charcoal, a few embers, and, of course, the echoes of well-meaning speeches about sustainability.
But don’t you worry! The Forest Department has assured us that they are on the case. Investigations are ongoing (as they often are), and officials—who, much like the saplings, have chosen to remain anonymous—believe that ‘miscreants’ may be responsible. It is, after all, a well-documented fact that miscreants enjoy nothing more than setting fire to government-funded tree plantations on barren land.
Environmentalists, never ones to say “I told you so” (except when they absolutely must), have raised an eyebrow or two. Right to Information activist Dilip Nath pointed out that the land in question had all the tree-growing potential of a cricket pitch and that before the government’s ambitious afforestation drive, the area was generating revenue from sand and rocks. Yes, rocks. A much more reliable crop, immune to fire, floods, and political changes.
Of course, what’s a Rs 3.13 crore public project without some good old-fashioned financial scrutiny? It turns out that between September 2023 and July 2024, the government acquired saplings eight times—because, much like a forgetful online shopper, they kept adding more to their cart in pursuit of that coveted Guinness title. It would seem that breaking records was the real priority, with the whole ‘trees surviving in an inhospitable wasteland’ bit being more of a side quest.
Now, as the ashes settle, questions arise. Should we have focused on actual forest conservation instead of turning barren land into a botanical graveyard? Was this entire exercise akin to attempting to grow tomatoes in a swimming pool? And most importantly, will we be applying for yet another Guinness World Record—perhaps for the most expensive unintentional fireworks display?
Stay tuned for the next great governmental triumph: an ambitious fish-farming project in the Thar Desert. What could possibly go wrong?
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