Lying isn’t necessarily all bad… lies can be stories and they might even be crucial in some situations but lying to the right people or to ourselves is the worst of all
By Kavya Nallabrolu
You and I, we lie. We lie to the person in front of us, we lie to the human beside us, we lie to the earth beneath our feet, the skies, and everything in between. Lying isn’t necessarily all bad, just hear me out here. Lies can be stories and they might even be crucial in some situations.
But lying to the right people is wrong and what’s worse is lying to ourselves. All of us do that by constructing expectations, it is destructive through all times. Even the tiniest of expectation has the power to negate our past, ruin our present experience, and exonerate the future. So, let me take you through yet another little lifely realization my friends and I stumbled uponon another one of our impromptu adventures.
My head felt heavy, I couldn’t see myself, but I knew it was red. All the blood had rushed to my face, as I lay on my back with my head hanging off the bedside. All because I had nothing better to do on a fine autumn afternoon, I was bored. We all were. The three of us were stuck in the vicious loop of work, eat, sleep, repeat and desperately wanted to break out.
Quickly an inverted zoomed-in face entered and consumed my eye frame. “Get out of my face Mia, you’re disrupting my ceiling-gazing time. I am very busy counting the dust particles on the fan right now, plus I can see your nose hair from this angle.”
“That’s gross,” she said ignoring my request for her to leave, “I’m bored, we should do something.” She said signalling me to skootch over.
“Wow, Einstein to the rescue. Gee, I hadn’t thought of that, thanksss,” my voice was laced with sarcasm. “Stop being a bitch and think of something better to do than bingeing shows, reading books, taking up alcoholism as a hobby, or ceiling-gazing,” she said, now lying beside me with her head hanging off the bedside. I knew we were speaking loudly when Ann shouted, “Let’s go someplace green,” from the living room.
In return, Mia shouted and asked Ann to stop shouting and to come into the bedroom. To which Ann shouted and said she was coming. Between all this shouting, I really liked Ann’s idea, I know we could all use a breath of fresh air. Excited, I sat up straight and so did the rest.“I heard there is a lake, a little far from here, what say we go there?” I asked recalling an ideal google search.
“That’s not a bad idea,” Mia said, whilst googling the place. “Only one problem, it’s 35kms from here and our broke butts don’t have the money for a cab to go that far.”
“Then let’s find a way to spend the least and travel. What if we hitched rides?” replied Ann. “That can be new and fun, we can also take public transport when necessary,” I said. All in agreement and excitement, we packed a few things in our bags and set off the see the lake. In google, its pictures were very enticing, big blue puddle surrounded by green hills, and so our expectations were set. The foundation for disappointment was laid.
Our journey was one of a kind, reckless and adventurous. First, we hopped on a shared auto, everyone knows how cheap they are, the price that is to be paid is a people sandwich, with sweat and irritation on the side. We got down at its last stop and decided to walk a little, all this while google maps was our guide. After a few attempts to hitch a ride, we decided to take a normal auto and get down at a junction.
So, we did the same and started to walk again holding a thumbs up onto the street. This time someone stopped. A school bus, the driver, a sweet old man, asked where we wanted to go, we named the lake and he told us to hop on. He said he can take us a little further, but from there ideally, we should take a public bus. The bus was filled with kids from about 7-10 years old. The driver had informed us that they all belonged to a school for deaf and dumb kids.
The children on the bus were surprised to see us, but they kept sending smiles our way nonetheless. As suggested, we took a public bus, which turned out to be wise because to further our journey we had to coil up and down a hill. The bus dropped us in a village and now we were very close to the lake. I think the time was around 4 pm because a school in the village had just been let out and a teacher was driving out from the exit gate (which was the same as the entrance) when she saw us.
She stopped her car and asked us where we were going. She could tell instantly we were not from around, from the way we dressed and of course our lost, tired looks. She asked us to hop in and said could take us a little farther. We sat there marvelling at our luck and humanity. Some people were kind enough to stop and lend us their hand. Perhaps, the outside world is not all bad. That’s something to ponder upon.
Anyways, coming back from wonderland, we were dropped off 1km from the lake, from there we started to walk. This long hectic journey, had me build up the final destination to something resembling a lake of swans. I was expecting a blue lake, on the shore of which we can sit, relax, and perhaps have a smoke or two. But there was no blue, only barren and torn brown land. The lake had dried up. I have travelled long and far for this, WHERE IS THE GOD DAMN LAKE???!! Google said so, where are my calm waters!?! So, all of that was for nothing?
Expecting something as reasonable as water in a lake can also completely taint an experience. So, think about all these expectations we have from our partners, sons, daughters, friends, and colleagues. How detrimental are they to our lives? People don’t let us down, our expectations do. When you don’t have expectations, you experience things and people transparently rather than clouded with presupposition. What if there is no water in the lake, it is still surrounded by green hills. We could have chosen to make the best of what we have and gone on a trek. We could have chosen to not be let down by this heaven we built in our head and perhaps had just been unsatisfied by the destination. This may sound subtle, but it has a vastly different emotional impact.
Leaving expectations out of an experience makes it more direct. The outcome is simply how you feel about it and not how you feel clouded by how you thought it would feel. Nothing and nobody can live up to the paradise we build in our heads. So, yell at your brain to shut up and just go on a trek.
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She is a designing student, an eager creator. Kavya believes in the power of stories.She loves the possibilities life can present, which keeps her on the constant lookout for new adventures, conversations, and lessons.