Calcutta Police arrests 9 youths for slogans
Calcutta Police arrested nine youths for raising slogans outside a Durga Puja marquee, turning a peaceful protest into a full-blown drama. Dive into this satirical take on Kolkata’s finest, as they skillfully transform pamphleteering into a criminal offence worthy of seven days in custody!
Ah, the Calcutta Police, always on point, aren’t they? Not with catching actual criminals, mind you – no, no, that would be far too conventional. Their true genius lies in turning a bit of youthful chanting into the crime of the century. A few pamphlets, a couple of slogans, and voilà, we’ve got ourselves a rebellion!
Imagine the scene: a few bright-eyed young revolutionaries outside a Durga Puja marquee, presumably disrupting the otherwise serene and oh-so-spiritual atmosphere of South Kolkata’s beloved chaos. What an utter disgrace! After all, the Puja season is meant for peace, quiet, and uninterrupted cacophony of dhakis, not some uppity students murmuring “We want justice!” over an alleged rape-murder. The nerve, really!
One can only picture the fearless constables of Lalbazar, who, clearly having nothing better to do, decided to swoop in on these terrible insurgents. Armed with their most dangerous weapon – bureaucracy – they carted off the lot to the headquarters, probably with the kind of triumph usually reserved for foiling a bank heist. I’m sure there was tea, biscuits, and a medal ceremony later for the brave souls who saved the public from the menace of free speech.
Now, let’s talk about the charges. Seven days in police custody, you say? It seems our friends at Lalbazar are planning a bit of a holiday with these chaps. One wonders what riveting conversations they’ll have in custody – perhaps a lesson in not being too vocal in public, or how to properly admire a Puja pandal in silence. A word of advice to the youths: next time, hand out leaflets about Kolkata’s finest mismanagement of traffic, or the city’s undying affection for potholes. They might even give you a free pass.
But alas, we mustn’t forget the larger issue at hand: the ongoing junior doctors’ protest over the RG Kar incident. The doctors, bless them, thought they were leading a movement, but as we can see, they’ve clearly been outwitted by the police, who, in their infinite wisdom, have turned a small protest into a city-wide sensation. Who needs justice when you’ve got a PR crisis, eh?
Of course, our dear Kunal Ghosh had to chime in, and oh, what a pearl of wisdom he offered: “You can protest, but not just anywhere.” Wise words indeed. Next time, protesters should probably call the police first, book a time slot, and perhaps hire a pandal decorator to make their slogans more aesthetically pleasing. Maybe the police would even applaud their creativity – provided it’s during office hours, of course.
In the grand tradition of Calcutta’s finest, the real triumph here is not solving crime or bringing justice to victims, but in the delicate art of making a mountain out of a molehill. Seven days for chanting? Why not just ship them off to the Andamans while you’re at it? After all, free speech must have consequences – just not for the actual criminals.
Ah, Calcutta Police – always keeping the city safe from the most dangerous of threats: pamphlets and slogans. Keep up the good work, lads!
The Latest Update at 5:27
Today, in a special hearing at the Calcutta High Court, all nine individuals involved in the protest were granted bail.
What's Your Reaction?
